A common complaint among women my age is an apparent double standard when it comes to dating. Christina Aguilera sums it up bluntly in her 2003 “girl-power” hit, Can’t Hold Us Down:
“The guy gets all the glory the more he can score, while the girl can do the same and yet you call her a whore”
On the one hand, it is good for women to point out this double standard. Men should not be able to get away with behaving this way if women can’t. But the solution that Aguilera (and so many other women today) come up with to solve this problem is to “turn the tables” on the men of our society. Women ought to feel justified in casually sleeping around with as many guys as possible and then bragging to all of our friends about it. If men can do it, so can we, right?
So, to recap, this is the plan we currently have in place to show men how great we are:
Step 1.) Complain about the way men behave.
Step 2.) Behave in the exact same way.
…hm. Does anyone else find this a little odd? Yet this is the basic thought process of much of modern feminism today. As Alice von Hildebrand writes in one of my favorite books, “Unwittingly, the feminists acknowledge the superiority of the male sex by wishing to become like men.”
I think guys are great and everything, but I don’t really want to become one. Personally, I think us women have a lot going for us without trying to trade in our feminine characteristics for masculine ones. One of the greatest tragedies of feminism is not that it is trying to make women too powerful or great. Modern feminism, in reality, doesn’t truly understand just how powerful a woman can be. The results of this are disastrous.
“With age…most girls become conscious of the power they can exercise over men. Those whose hearts are noble…will never use their charm to play with the strong sex, or worse to ‘seduce’ it to gain their own subjective ends” (Von Hildebrand, p. 50-51)
I think the woman that abuses her charm over a man in this way does not yet truly understand just how much power she has been given in her femininity. If she did, she would recognize what a tremendous gift she had been given in her femininity and would not dream of abusing it in such a way. To any woman reading this, we need to work together to redefine what it means to be a feminist. To misunderstand this gift is to do yourself an injustice.